Proverbs: Trust

Intro:

Good morning! In our Proverbs "Summer of Wisdom," guest speaker Tiffany Aicklen challenges us: we trust God, but God also desires to trust us. He longs for people of integrity and honesty for partnership.

Scripture References: Proverbs 3:5-6, 10:9, 19:1, 28:27, 11:3, 19:5, 24:26, 25:18, 26:28, 12:22, Matthew 23:16-22, Exodus 22:9

Key Points:

• God's Desire to Trust Us: God longs for His people to have integrity and honesty, wanting to partner and trust us with His Kingdom.
• Integrity: Wholeness, Not Duplicity: "Whoever walks in integrity walks securely" (Prov 10:9). Be the same person in public/private—whole, not fractured. Lack of integrity hurts trust. Live whole.
• Honesty: Truth, Not Lies: "A false witness will not go unpunished" (Prov 19:5). Lies harm. "An honest answer is like a kiss" (Prov 24:26). Lord detests lies, delights in trustworthiness (Prov 12:22). Jesus, our model, was pure truth; we're called to "let your 'yes' be 'yes'."
• Trust as Relational Equity: Lack of integrity is a "breach of trust" (Ex 22:9)—it damages relationships. Trust is vital glue, preserving our most valuable relationship with God. Our choices matter; we desire to delight Him. Small acts of dishonesty (like the "cilantro test") reveal deeper heart issues impacting God's trust.
• Building Trust: Essential Elements: Understanding, Motive, Ability, Character, and Track Record. God embodies all five perfectly. He understands, is for us (even at His cost), is able, has perfect character, and a perfect track record.

Conclusion:

We aren't perfectly trustworthy, but God is. Press into relationship with Him, the trustworthy One. We cannot be just on our own; we trust in Jesus, who is just and justifies us.

Calls to Action:

• Repent: Confess trust breaches with God/others—lies, hidden sins.
• Run to God: Don't hide. His grace frees us; His blood covers, cleanses, and restores.
• Communion & Prayer: Come to the table, remembering Jesus bridged the gap. If your heart is cold or you need to feel God's presence, seek prayer. Bring all into the light; Jesus' gospel sets us free!

Transcript

Hey, I'm going to introduce our guest speaker this morning. She is from Visalia, California and has, is it five? Five daughters. 

 Would you welcome Tiffany Aicklen to the stage? 

 We're going to continue in our series from Proverbs and hear from Lady Wisdom here. So, Jesus,(...) thank you for my wife and thank you for this time together in your word. And pray that ultimately you would speak to us through Tif and that she would sense a connection with you as she shares your heart and a connection with us as she shares what she believes is on your heart for us. So just bless her today. Amen. Amen.(...) Thank you. Good morning.(...) Good to see you all. 

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 Any guesses at what the most famous passage from Proverbs is? 

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 Want to say it with me? 

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 Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.(...) In all your ways, acknowledge him and he will make your path straight. 

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 We're going to talk about trust today but in a different kind of way. 

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 There is clear commands from the Lord throughout Scripture to trust him. To trust him with all of our heart, all of our mind, everything that we have. 

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 But something that's caught my attention throughout the book of Proverbs is actually a longing in God's heart to be able to trust us, his people. 

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 And it maybe doesn't come straight out in like trust language but it comes out in language like regarding honesty and integrity. 

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 Regarding living blameless and righteous and there's so many scriptures throughout Proverbs and actually the entire Bible where God's addressing these issues and calling us to be people he could trust. 

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 Because he actually wants to partner with us.(...) Says that he wants to give us more, he wants to trust us with more, he wants to let us in on things he's doing, he wants to trust us with his kingdom. 

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 And it's a really big deal and so we're going to talk about that today. 

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 God doesn't just ask us to trust him but he desires to have a people that he can trust. And so we're going to look at some scriptures about honesty and integrity to start off with. Let's start with integrity. 

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 Proverbs 10, 9 says, "Whoever walks in integrity walks securely but whoever takes crooked paths will be found out." 

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 Means you didn't get away with it, you're never going to get away with it. Proverbs 19, 1 says, "Better the poor whose walk is blameless than a fool whose lips are perverse." 

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 Proverbs 27 says, "The righteous lead blameless lives and blessed are their children after them." Meaning there's like generational blessing from walking with God in a trustworthy way. There's generational blessing that's passed down to our kids when we live in obedience to the Lord. 

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 And in Proverbs 11, 3 it says, "The integrity of the upright guides them but the unfaithful are destroyed by their duplicity." 

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 And I love this word duplicity. I feel like it's the best picture when we're talking about integrity because integrity means wholeness. 

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 Integrity means you're the same person here on Sunday morning that you were last night in your bed on your screen. It means you're the same person at home with your family that you are at work with your coworkers.(...) It's a wholeness. There's an internal unity inside of you. There's a congruency in your life that means you show up the same everywhere you go. 

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 For all of you people good at math, I am not one of them. Inerture is a whole number, not a fraction. And that's the idea with integrity is there's a wholeness with it. And when we lack integrity or we're unintegrous, it fractures us on the inside and it hurts trust. 

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 So are you the same person in private that you are in public? Are there different versions of you? 

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 The invitation from the Lord is to live whole and not fractured. 

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 And then moving on to honesty, if those weren't hard enough, let's talk about how we're all liars. 

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 Proverbs 19 5 says a false witness will not go unpunished and whoever pours out lies will not go free. 

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 Proverbs 24 26 says an honest answer is like a kiss on the lips. I love this picture because it kind of smacks you in the face, right? Like sometimes honesty can kind of like, whoa, okay, that was honest,(...) but it's loving.(...) The motivation is loving. 

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 Versus Proverbs 25 18 that says like a club or a sword or a sharp arrow is one who gives false testimony against a neighbor that lies are like being pierced with a sword, not loving. 

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 Proverbs 26 28 says a lying tongue hates those it hurts and a flattering mouth, which is just a different form of lying because you're saying good things that you don't mean.(...) A flattering mouth works ruin. 

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 And Proverbs 12 22 says the Lord detests lying lips, but he delights in people who are trustworthy. So here it is. We're hearing the longing of his heart. Some translations say faithful, but it's like the reason why he doesn't like lies. And the reason why he loves honesty is because he's desiring to have a people that he can trust. 

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 And Jesus is our model in this. Jesus was absolutely trustworthy. 

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 He was totally honest and full of integrity.(...) He was whole and not fractured. He was the same everywhere. He showed up. He was the same. He always spoke the truth, even when it was costly, even when it got him in trouble, even when it caused people to walk away from him.(...) He never bent the truth to gain favor with people. He never withheld the truth to avoid conflict or to protect himself or his own image. He didn't operate like that. He called himself the truth. It was one of his names. 

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 And it says in scripture that it's impossible for God to lie because it's against his nature. It's incongruent with who he is. He's the truth. 

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 In Matthew 23, we see Jesus calling his disciples to let their yes be yes and their no be no, to not swear by this or that or make promises by God's name or the temple, but to recognize that God is with them everywhere they are and that there wouldn't be levels of truth in their life. That they wouldn't say yes over here and no over there, but they would show up the same before God in all places with people. 

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 He wants us to be like him. This is part of our salvation is that the gospel has brought us in and it's covered over all of our sin and all of our lies and all of our internal fractures and all of our lack of integrity. And it's washed us clean and it's set us on our feet again with God and right relationship with God. 

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 And Jesus did all of that so that we could have relationship with God,(...) a relationship with God and relationships require trust. And so now we're the rest of our lives. We come out of the waters of baptism last week. The whole rest of our lives with God are about walking out a relationship where we're trusting him, where we're seeing how trustworthy he is, where we're being transformed into his image and becoming sons and daughters that he can trust. 

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 In Exodus 22 9 it's talking about like lying and stealing kind of in relationship to animals and scales, but it calls a lack of integrity a breach of trust. 

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 Again,(...) it's another picture that I love because I think about a breach in a wall and I think about I think about trust in relationship being something that's trust is a process trust is built like a wall is built trust can be damaged like a wall can be damaged and a lack of integrity or lying. 

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 In Exodus is called a breach of trust. There's something that's broken down in the wall that needs to be addressed. 

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 Stephen Covey calls or sorry, this is a quote by Stephen Covey and he says that trust is the glue of life. 

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 It's the most essential ingredient in effective communication and it's the foundational principle that holds all relationships together.(...) Trust is relational equity.(...) If we have a good relationship, what we have between one another is trust. 

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 I used to I don't know I'm a I'm an 80s kid, right? I used to read a children's book. I can't remember the name of it, but all I remember it was it was terrifying because the kid in the story lied and then the lie showed up like this little creature. 

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 It was a booger. 

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 Then it kept lying in a cover up the lie and the thing grew every time he lied it grew and then it was ugly and gross and he was trying to hide it. He was like hiding it under his bed and then it grew too big to fit under his bed anymore and now he's trying to shove it into the closet to hide it and it's spilling out of the closet and I just remember as a kid being terrified. 

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 But it was it was terrified of being caught. It was terrified of being bad of getting in trouble and now that I'm a parent with five daughters, we've dealt with a lot of lying over the years. 

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 We just have.(...) And the thing I'm always talking to the girls about is. It's not about lying. 

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 You're bad.(...) Tell the truth. You're good. 

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 That's salvation by works. That's earning. 

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 We're talking about relationships. So even with my girls,(...) I say, Hey,(...) when you lie, you hurt trust and trust is our relationship. And I know you care about your relationship. So trust is like the equity you have with me and dad or trust is the equity you have with your sisters. Trust is the equity you have with your friends and I don't want to see you damage that because I know how important that person is to you or these relationships are to you. 

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 And it's the same with us.(...) The invitation this morning as we talk about honesty and integrity is not inviting you into perfecting self. 

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 Or living in a way that would earn something from God. We're talking about preserving a relationship and we're talking about. 

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 A relationship with God. A relationship with God. 

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 Our relationship with God is the most valuable and precious thing that we have. 

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 There's nothing more valuable than it. And so tending to trust in our lives, growing in trustworthiness. Again,(...) it's not about perfecting me. It is about preserving what I have with God and others and seeing it grow and flourish, which is essential to our Christian faith. 

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 If somebody is with you, again, this is Jesus reminding us that the presence of God is always with us. He's always with us. 

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 So there's never getting away with it. 

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 And if someone's with you who you love, it does bring a sobriety and accountability to your life. It does. If someone's with you that you love, you don't want to grieve them.(...) You don't want to grieve them. 

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 In the last couple of years, I felt convicted over some sin in my life. And I realized I am hurting. This is not about how bad me. I'm doing this again. 

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 I'm hurting the one that I love first and most.(...) I'm grieving him.(...) And I don't want to do that because I care so much about him. So when someone's with us that we love, we don't want to grieve them.(...) We don't want to disappoint them. We want to delight them. 

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 And so it matters what we say and what we do.(...) Their presence brings us joy and comfort and peace. And we want to tend to the trust between us. 

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 A couple of weeks ago, I went to Vallarta supermarket to buy salsa supplies. 

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 And I grabbed some tomatoes and some onion. We were making pico de gallo. And I grabbed some organic cilantro and some organic jalapeno. And I go and all the lines are busy and I get into the self checkout area to check out. Me and a couple of the girls were with me. And the screen pops up and on the screen is like most commonly purchased items, which at Vallarta are tomatoes, onions, cilantro, and jalapenos. It was all right there. It was like, sweet. I don't have to type anything in or look anything up. Boom, boom, boom. Check out. We're walking out of the store to the car. And all of a sudden this thought swirls through my mind real quietly and quickly. I grabbed organic. 

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 Can we just talk about self checkout for a second? You know this pain.(...) And do you know the internal battle that starts going on where it's like justifying, justifying, right? Do you know how much money they make off of me? And if they really cared about me getting organic, right, they would pay an employee to check me out. This would not have happened if I didn't have to check myself out, right? All of the things,(...) all the justifications. 

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 And I'm walking and this is happening.(...) And then I hear the Lord say,(...) can I trust you with herbs? 

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 Can I trust you with herbs? 

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 And I turn around and I go back to the store and I make it right. 

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 Not because I'm like obsessing over 10 cents,(...) but because I'm hearing the voice of the one I love. 

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 And I want him to trust me with herbs because if he can't trust me with herbs, how can he trust me with a person he created that he loves? And if he can't trust me with 10 cents, how can he trust me with the things of his kingdom? And I want to be trusted with those things. I want to be trusted with people.(...) I want to be trusted with the things of his kingdom. And so I turn around and go back into the store and I make it right because I want him to trust me with herbs. 

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 Proverbs is such a practical book.(...) And so let's get practical for a minute.(...) We're so familiar with this word trust.(...) Right? 

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 I'm so familiar with this word trust. But then if you start asking questions like,(...) how do you define trust? What's the definition of trust? 

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 How do you say what it is?(...) What makes up trust?(...) Why do you trust that person and not that person? 

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 Do I trust you or do I not trust you? Is it black and white? Or are there varying degrees of trust? It's nuanced. And so I want to help us get clearer. 

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 There was a lot of definitions and I don't know if any of them are still like, I don't know that one of them was like, yes, that's it. But I'm going to read you too. Trust is built on the foundation of integrity and reliability when what you say, what you do and who you are all align consistently. So it is, it's the wholeness thing. 

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 It's the lack of fracture. It's the same, same, same. And it's experiencing that in another person that gives you the confidence to put weight on them. Trust as we release it to someone else is making something that's valuable to us vulnerable to the actions of another person. That hits home.(...) How do we build the trust?(...) If we're in a relationship and it's needing a little more trust, what are some particular things we could do to strengthen trust in a relationship? 

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 What are some particular things I could grow in to become a more trustworthy person? And so here's five essential elements of trust.(...) The first is understanding. And it's that your needs are understood, felt and cared about by someone.(...) Essentially, they get what matters to you and they care about it. The second is motive.(...) Meaning that their motive is for you and not just for themselves.(...) That at every point that's crucial, they won't choose the thing that's advantageous for them.(...) That they have your back. They'll do nothing to harm you. 

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 When in their power, even in your absence, they will do what is best for you, even at times at their own loss or cost, they are for you. 

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 You might feel like someone understands you and cares about you. You might believe that they're for you even when you're not around, that they're going to be working for your good.(...) They could be lacking in some ability.(...) Ability. We might find this in a work in a work relationship. They have the ability to deliver results for what has been entrusted to them. 

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 They show up and do the thing they've been asked to do. The fourth is character.(...) They have a needed and proven essential character. They have the traits needed for the relationship, which can vary relationship to relationship, but they're honest or faithful. They're integrous. They're kind. 

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 This might be where in relationship we find ourselves saying like making a request for what I'm needing. I'm just needing a little bit of this from you. I'm needing a little bit of kindness. 

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 And the last is a track record.(...) A track record builds trust.(...) You'll depend on someone based on what they did the last time. So we're working with history and relationship and how we've shown up in the past and what we're building with a track record. 

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 So now I get to tell you about a breach in the wall for me and a time that I stole from my grandmother,(...) which is the worst thing you could ever do.(...) And if you know me, you know how much I love my grandmother.(...) I highly esteem her.(...) And this was years. This is a long time ago. She had a beach house and we went and stayed in the beach house and I cooked food and it was on a tray and it was left over and I wanted to bring it home and I couldn't find another vessel to package it in. And so I brought the tray home. I did not intentionally steal from her. But the reality is I took something that didn't belong to me. It belongs to her. I didn't ask her to take it and then I didn't tell her afterwards that I took it.(...) And I think in my heart I was like, I'm going to next time I go. I'm just going to give it back. I'm going to return it.(...) And then the beach house sold and I lost the opportunity to return the tray. 

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 And so the tray was living in my cupboard, in the back of one of my cupboards for years. And every time I opened that cupboard and I saw it,(...) I felt guilty seeing that tray. And then I felt like too much time had gone by that it was going to become weird to say anything about it or give it back. And what would I say? And that would be dumb and embarrassing. And she doesn't even care.(...) The woman would give me the shirt off her back. She doesn't care about this tray. But this is what was going on. And then I would think, I should just donate it and get rid of it. And then I would think, I'm trying to destroy the evidence. 

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 And then the enemy would be in my ear.(...) But you stole from your grandma.(...) You stole from her. What kind of person are you? Stealing from her your grandma you love so much.(...) And all along I kept hearing the Lord just make it right.(...) Just make it right. 

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 But it felt dumb and I didn't want to humble like, honestly, like it was the pride. It was pride. It was protecting my image with her. 

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 And so finally one day and then I also lived in the fear that what if one time she's over and someone like grabs a tray and pulls it out and puts it on the counter and she's like, isn't that mine? Okay. 

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 So finally one day, like eight years later,(...) she came by my house and I was like,(...) I just confessed. 

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 And she probably thought it was silly.(...) But it wasn't silly for me. 

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 Because it was about God trusting me with what he was convicting me of in my heart.(...) What I felt guilty about what the enemy had a little hook in me with because I was keeping it hidden and in the dark. 

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 I didn't want to tell my grandma this now I'm telling all of you this. Why?(...) Because when we come out of hiding and we come out of the dark, however little or big and we bring it into the light and we confess what is true. I took something from you without asking.(...) I never returned it. I'm sorry. Please forgive me.(...) We get forgiven and we get cleansed and we get free.(...) And now the enemy can't poke at me anymore over stealing from my grandmother. 

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 So now that I have you thinking about all the ways that you've broken trust and all the ways that people have broken trust with you, what do we do?(...) What do we do about it?(...) Because we're not trustworthy.(...) Are we? 

 (...) 

 And they're not trustworthy.(...) Are they?(...) But he is.(...) He is trustworthy.(...) He knows us.(...) He understands. 

 (...) 

 He understood all the things I thought and felt about the tray. 

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 And he knew what I needed and was nudging me towards it.(...) He hears our cries and he responds to us. His motivation is for us.(...) He has our back.(...) He did not choose what was most advantageous for himself. 

 (...) 

 He was for us, even at a cost to himself,(...) even death on a cross.(...) That's how we know that we can trust him and that he's for us. He's delivered results for what was entrusted to him. And we are all the beneficiaries. He's able in every way, unlimited, perfect in character, the same yesterday, today, and forever. 

 (...) 

 And he has a perfect track record that he's recorded in a precious book so that we could read it over and over again to remind ourselves how trustworthy he is. He's trustworthy. 

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 And so what do we do?(...) We press into relationship with him, the trustworthy one.(...) We repent of our sin, of our breaches in the wall, of where we've missed it, of where we've hurt trust in relationship with him. I'm wanting us to tend to our relationship with God this morning. 

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 How have we broken trust with him?(...) Have we lied?(...) Have we been fractured on the inside, being different in different places? 

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 We get to run to the one who did everything needed so that we could come close and not be rejected,(...) not be punished. 

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 Sometimes we want to hide lying because we live in fear of punishment.(...) His grip of grace sets us free. We sang about it this morning. So we can run to God and with courage, we can follow his voice, we can repent, we can confess to him what's true, we can confess to one another what's true. And we can be confident that his blood will be enough to cover us, to forgive us, to wash us clean, and to set us back on our feet again in right relationship with him and in right relationship with one another. 

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 So we're going to respond this morning in two ways.(...) We're going to respond in communion.(...) And there's going to be a prayer team up here ready to pray with you. 

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 And I want to encourage you, please,(...) if there's any hiding in the dark,(...) even in stupid little things like I shared this morning that could easily be brushed off, but it's been eight years. 

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 Or I've never confessed this to another soul.(...) This is what the gospel of Jesus Christ is for. 

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 That we could be forgiven from all of our sin and set free by his grace.(...) So please, with courage, come before the Lord. 

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 Let's go ahead and stand. 

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 And let's get the elements. 

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 We'll pray together.(...) And then the prayer team will be available for ministry. 

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 The worship team, will you come?